Help Meet Ministries

Marriage Tip: Know Your Family History

2012-02-06T00:30:00.000-04:00

Your tip of the week:

Many situations come up in marriages that stem from you or your husband's past. It may be the style of parenting that was used by either of your parents. It may be the absence of one or both parents physically, emotionally or otherwise. It is important to know about each other's past in order to better understand each other and give grace to each other in times of misunderstanding.

Read more about Knowing Your Family History at the Marriage Alive! website.

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We're Back

2012-02-03T15:52:00.000-04:00

Wow! That was a very long break. Just a short note to let you know the site is back up. Look forward to many helpful posts on being the help meet to your husband that God has called you to be.

A break

2009-07-02T07:46:00.003-04:00

I know you've noticed that Help Meet Ministries have not posted anything for the past few weeks. So sorry to have to say this but we are taking a much needed break for a while.

The Generous Wife Tips are on Fruitful Vine's blog as well as lots of other good stuff - Click HERE to go there and become a follower so you can keep abreast.

Have a blessed day.

Meal Plan & Grocery List Giveaway

2009-06-10T13:43:00.001-04:00

How would you like to have 2 hours free to do whatever you want, not what everyone else wants this week? It's not easy. Moms are always working on something or busy taking care of someone else's needs.

Take planning your family's meals and grocery. Do you know how much time many people spend on that? According to many, about 2 hours. It would be so nice to outsource that, and I've got a suggestion for you.

A free meal plan and grocery list from Dine Without Whine. They are giving a way the plan free here. If you need those extra hours free and want help with meal planning, go ahead and click that link to grab your free plan.

The Generous Wife tip - Sensual Play

2009-06-10T07:00:00.000-04:00

Wonderful tip.

When you are in the shower or bath, call out to your husband for help. You can ask for something as simple as a little washing of your back or use it as an excuse to invite him to join you. The idea is to involve your husband in a bit of sensual play, whatever your comfort zone and your bathroom set up will allow (please do be careful as soapy water can be quite slippery).

Drink and imbibe deeply, O lovers. Song of Songs 5:1b NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Sharing is Caring

2009-06-09T07:00:00.001-04:00

There is a Sunday School rhyme that goes - Sharing is caring. Apply this to your marriages today.

Share what you have. Eating a handful of peanuts? Offer him a couple. Watching a TV show? Move over and offer him a spot. Reading the comics? Read the funniest ones out loud and share the humor.

Courtesies of a small and trivial character are the ones which strike deepest in the grateful and appreciating heart. Henry Clay

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Be on the same page financially

2009-06-05T07:30:00.000-04:00

Lori shares about finances today and how important it is for couples to be on the same page. Read on...

My husband and I attended a banquet for With This Ring. I mention it because 1) I respect their ministry and 2) because I think it's important for husband and wife to be on the same page when it comes to finances and giving.
I realize that there is not likely to be total agreement on everything financial between husband and wife, but with prayer and at least some gracious compromise it can be navigated. If you have difficulty in this particular area, then I encourage you get educated (most bookstores have scads of books about family finances - Total Money Makeover is not a bad place to start) and begin to pray for wisdom and direction in this area.

Don't tell me where your priorities are. Show me where you spend your money and I'll tell you what they are. James Frick

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Win a Free Copy of Honey, I Don't Have a Headache Tonight

2009-06-04T07:26:00.002-04:00

Honey, I Don't Have a Headache Tonight: Help for Women Who Want to Feel More in the Mood

Father's Day is coming up, and this year, why not get something that YOU read (or listen to), and HE reaps the rewards from?

If you want to stop your marriage from fizzling and start it sizzling, We've got the answer for you!

He says, "you’re never in the mood." She says, "That's all you ever think about!" It’s a conflict as old as time. We’re told "opposites attract", but given time and circumstance, what once lured you in, can quickly lure you out.

But you don't have to be stuck in this trap!

Sheila's book, Honey, I Don't Have a Headache Tonight: Help for women who want to feel more in the mood, can help you solve this impasse! It's fun, real, and extremely practical.

This book is great, and we know it can help your marriage.

We know, because Sheila, the author, didn't always have a great marriage. She's not "talking down" to you. She wrote it as a research project to help herself. And her husband says he definitely liked the research!

So often we find intimacy difficult because men and women ARE different. Women wonder why men were created with the switch always turned on, and men wonder why women were created with so many different switches and no instruction manual.

Honey, I Don't Have a Headache Tonight
helps us bridge this gap by helping us to understand our husbands better, get more energy, heal past hurts, and increase romance & respect in our marriages! You'll also learn why understanding God's view of sexuality can actually make you more in the mood--even if that sounds strange!

Filled with practical advice, Honey I Don't Have a Headache Tonight tackles these issues:

* How change in the sexual relationship requires change elsewhere.
* Why sex for women is often a "head thing."
* How television is the biggest enemy to intimacy.
* Why forgiveness and letting go of the need to be right is so important.
* How self-image issues and past hurts can throw intimacy into a tailspin.
* The repercussions of everyday energy zappers.
* The threats to Godly sexuality.
* The roadblocks of respect.
* The cultural attacks on gender.

And more! And best of all, it's fun to read!
It's Sheila's Father's Day special this month, along with a 45-minute hilarious and practical talk Sheila's given on the subject.

But here's how you can win it! You have three choices:

1. Blog post. Just copy this post (or write your own), and enter it in your blog. Then go here, and fill out the form! Enter your email address and the URL of your post! Remember to include this bottom part in the post about how they can enter!

2. Share on Facebook. Just click the "Share This" button below to share on Facebook! It couldn't be easier! Then head on over here and fill out the contest entry, including your name on Facebook in the right spot.

3. Twitter Tweet. Or you can post on Twitter. Just tweet something like this:

Turn the heat in your marriage up! Win a free copy of Honey, I Don't Have a Headache Tonight just by tweeting! http://bit.ly/MIDO3

Then head on over here and enter your email address and your Twitter ID!

It's that easy!

NOTE: Remember, to enter, you must fill out this form! It's really short (just your email and which way you entered), but she'll be drawing the winners from there!

Sheila will be drawing a winner one week from today, on next week's Wifey Wednesday at 8:30 a.m. EST June 10. So enter now to win!

The Generous Wife tip - Help in the healing process

2009-06-04T07:00:00.000-04:00

Lori shares a personal experience she had while out with her husband and gives a few lessons from it. Read on to hear what Lori says to us today...

When my husband and I were grabbing a bite today (errand day), we happened to see the aftermath of a fender bender. Now I am a people watcher (and a good number of tips come from real life), so this was a sad and educational moment for me.
     Apparently a gentleman had very lightly bumped a lady's car as they were waiting to make a right turn, so lightly bumped that there wasn't a mark to be seen on anyone's car. The next half hour, I watched the woman rant and rave at the man (who had made the mistake of being blunt with her) and several people on her phone, harass a couple of policemen (who couldn't find a scratch on her bumper either), and generally irritate everyone (including those of us having a meal in the restaurant who could see and hear her ... tantrum (honestly, just no other word for it)).
     As my husband and I discussed everyone's behavior, we basically talked about how to deal with wounded people and how to take the heat out of difficult situations where there is little you can really do to help someone. The woman in the fender bender obviously felt violated by the event, but it was such a minor slight, and an accident at that, that you have to deduce that her anger was really about her stuff that got set off by the incident. Theoretically it might have helped if someone could have connected with her, listened to her and tried to validate her feelings.
     So I observed two things today that I am passing on to you as tips. Please own your own wounds and get help when you need it (if you are often hurt and/or angry, that's a red flag). When your spouse is acting out of their wounds (and things may clearly have nothing to do with you or anything you've done), stay calm, stay kind and listen. When people are in pain they will act out. Sometimes a listening ear (and certainly a kind voice) can begin to take the heat out of a difficult situation and may actually begin the healing process.

     It is better to listen in order to understand than to listen in order to reply. Author Unknown

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-30T08:00:00.002-04:00

God Among Us is in today's Follower Spotlight. As said in the profile - God Among Us is a blogsite devoted to revealing God's presence among us all.

Check it out by clicking this link - God Among Us

The Generous Wife tip - Don't Play the Blame Game

2009-05-30T07:00:00.000-04:00

Don't play the blame game. Be kind when your husband's choices cost you through no fault of his own. Sometimes life just happens. (Of course, it's good to be understanding and kind when he messes up too.)

Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. Dale Carnegie

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2008 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Share laughter

2009-05-29T07:00:00.001-04:00

Laughter is so healing. What ways can you bring humor into your marriage? Perhaps rent a comedy to share (with popcorn and a bit of snuggling). Get a good book of jokes and share a few with your husband or read the comics together. Look for the humorous and share it with your husband. (My husband often forwards funny pictures and jokes to me. I still have a valentine on my computer that he sent (Sheen as UltraLord, Jimmy Newtron rocks).) :)

A merry heart does good, like medicine ... Proverbs 17:22a NKJV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Pray for his enemies

2009-05-28T07:00:00.001-04:00

Pray for those who are your husband's "enemies," the one's who don't get along with him, the ones that are jealous of him, and the one's that are just down right angry at him (for real or imagined reasons). It's not easy, but we are commanded to love our enemies and pray for them. You will be sowing peace into a difficult situation.

But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you. Matthew 5:44 NKJV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Make room for his clothes

2009-05-27T07:00:00.000-04:00

Do a little cleaning up in your bedroom closet so that there is enough room for your husband's clothes and stuff as well (I swear closets are the worst, things multiply when the doors are shut, I tell you). You might need to pack away off season clothes or get an organizer or two.

Kindness is the oil that takes the friction out of life. Author Unknown

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-26T08:00:00.000-04:00

Evelyn of A Journey to Living Foods is in the Follower Spotlight today. Evelyn is a natural hair specialist and has taken great strides in the area of healthy living and chronicles it in her blog.

Visit her by clicking these links:

A Journey to Living Foods.

Natural Beauty Solns

The Generous Wife tip - Let Him Know

2009-05-26T07:00:00.001-04:00

Our husbands need to know that we desire them. So let your husband know. Meet him at the door and give him a kiss he won't forget or sit on his lap for awhile and don't turn him loose too soon.

... when I found him who my soul loves; I held on to him and would not let him go ... Song of Songs 3:4 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip- Take turns reading

2009-05-25T07:00:00.000-04:00

Take turns reading things that you find interesting to each other. It might be a favorite scripture or quote. Perhaps share a passage from a favorite novel or a bit from a news article. Share why it is special or of interest to you and share your thoughts about it. (Paul and I sometimes do this with movie dates as well. We share what part of the movie stood out to us and about anything that seemed profound or had truth in it.)

The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches, but to reveal to him his own. Benjamin Disraeli

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2008 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-23T08:00:00.001-04:00

In the Follower Spotlight today we have John of Policy Diary. As it says on his site, John has written considerably in areas of public policy spanning politics, mortgage reform, immigration and gun control.

Check out his site by clicking this link - Policy Diary.

The Generous Wife tip - The Bed

2009-05-23T07:00:00.001-04:00

Make your bed a place of touching, talking, snuggling and making love. Try to keep all disagreements and tough discussions in another room or at least off the bed (perhaps on a loveseat in the bedroom?). Let your marriage bed be a place of blessing and intimacy.

... I will give you my love. Song of Songs 7:12b NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Notice His Integrity

2009-05-22T07:00:00.000-04:00

Having integrity can be quite challenging some days. There are plenty of opportunities to cut corners, tell white lies, etc.
     When your husband has said or done something that shows integrity, be sure to compliment him on his choice to do the right thing. It's encouraging to know that someone noticed and it's nice to be appreciated for making those hard choices.

     The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. Martin Luther King, Jr.


Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - His Favorite Kiss

2009-05-21T07:00:00.000-04:00

Ask your husband, "What is your favorite kind of kiss?" (Then be sure to demonstrate and ask him if you did it just right.) ;)

Your lips, my bride, drip honey; honey and milk are under your tongue ... Song of Songs 4:11b NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Pray for others

2009-05-20T07:00:00.000-04:00

Let's spend a little time today praying for those who have not heard the gospel and for those who are in any kind of lack. That might be the neighbor who just lost her husband, or your friend who got laid off at work. It might mean praying for a ministry or for an outreach at your church. Just begin to lay before the Father those who are in need.

God tells us to burden him with whatever burdens us. Author Unknown

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2008 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-19T08:00:00.000-04:00

The Follower Spotlight today is on Amy Ellen of Health Begins With Mom. This site has tons of information on health and healthy eating for the family.

Check her out by clicking this link - Health Begins With Mom.

The Generous Wife tip - Unexpected Nudity

2009-05-19T07:00:00.000-04:00

Unexpected nudity tends to be a turn on to most men. Use that to bless your husband. Call him into the bedroom to help with a project (how did you manage to lose your blouse?) or give him a (not so?) quick glimpse of what you are not wearing under your skirt.

My love is mine and I am his ... Song of Songs 2:16a NIV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Movies

2009-05-18T07:00:00.000-04:00

I encourage y'all to rent a couple of good movies and just make an evening of it (with or without the presence of others). Fireproof is a good one, but anything fun will do. Pop up some popcorn, snuggle and hold hands on the couch, and enjoy.

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Give Him the Benefit of the Doubt

2009-05-16T07:00:00.001-04:00

Give your husband the benefit of the doubt when there are misunderstandings. None of us are perfect when it comes to communication and mistakes will happen. Handle them with grace and kindness.

... put on a heart of ... kindness ... Colossians 3:12 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-15T08:00:00.001-04:00

The Follower Spotlight falls on Noelle. Noelle is the Founder/CEO of an awesome ministry - Take Root & Write Publishing LLC.

Check out what she is doing for and with Christian women at the following sites:

Take Root and Write

Christian Women Take Root

Christian Women Affiliate

The Generous Wife tip - Let Him Pick

2009-05-15T07:00:00.000-04:00

The next time you are in a clothing store with your husband, take his hand and pull him into the undies section. Let him pick out something that he would like to see you wear.

The curves of your hips are like jewels, the work of the hands of an artist. Song of Songs 7:1 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Bless Him with What He Wants

2009-05-14T07:00:00.000-04:00

Lori shares with us today about her husband's birthday. Read on...

Today is my husband's birthday. :) When I thought about celebrating it, I reminded myself to do things that will really bless him (instead of doing things the way I think they should be done). So ... we're having spice cake with blue peppermint frosting (some weird thing that got started when he was a kid and apparently it's not a real birthday without this weird concoction). Gifts are minimal, but fun with friends and family are a must. We'll also find time to eat at this really great seafood restaurant (where they make you wear a fish hat when it's your birthday, I kid you not). LOL
All this silly sharing to say, when your husband has special days, let the celebration be about what he wants. You want to bless him, right?

Tolerance and celebration of individual differences is the fire that fuels lasting love. Tom Hannah

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Be Considerate In Your Difficult Times

2009-05-12T07:00:00.002-04:00

Lori shares some introspection today:

<WARNING: very long, rambling, introspective post>

     A couple of weeks ago I pulled some muscles in my back ... badly. Generally speaking I'm pretty calm about life, so I didn't let it get to me. I've spent the days reading, praying, watching a couple of movies, writing, etc. and spending what time I could on my feet doing a few of the most critical things (shuffling to the bathroom, generous tips, a moment or two of bookkeeping, etc.). My family has been gracious and helpful in taking up the slack, so life was awkward, but doable.
    The days passed and I got slowly better, carefully taking on small bits of responsibility again (it's amazing how exciting folding clothes can be). ;) I could spend a bit more time on the computer and I even got the kitchen relatively clean. Life was looking good.
     Then ... I injured my back again, in it's healing but still fairly weakened state. I'm not back to square one (maybe two or three), but it was a huge disappointment to me, as you might guess.
     I've had lots of quiet time (a blessing to me), but I've also fallen behind in work (sorry for the delay in change over to the new system). I've had to rely on others a good deal (not always an easy thing to do) and I've had to shuffle past messes I would have normally cleaned up (a bit of a stretch for a neatnik like me).
     I've had unusual stresses followed by significant disappointment. ("Surely there is a conclusion to this," you're saying by now.) ;) All in all it has been a hugely educational experience for me. I've watched how I've responded to the different stresses and I've done my best not to take it out on those nearest to me, to be sensitive to their needs and the changes in their lives that my limitations have caused.
     I'm not saying I've been perfect about it or that I am hiding my feelings, just that I feel responsible to continue to be generous and considerate in the face of difficult circumstances. My husband knows what a struggle this has been for me, but he also knows that I appreciate his help and that I'm not going to throw a temper tantrum at him. During an already difficult time, it's nice to know that your spouse is going to be understanding and appreciative rather than fussy and difficult.
     Tip time: How do you handle stress and disappointment? How much does it effect the way you treat your husband? Again, I'm not suggesting we all become June Cleaver complete with plastic smile. I am just suggesting that we share our private struggles with our husbands in a way that does not harm, that does not add to an already difficult situation.

     Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James, 1:2-4 NIV

Think generous! Lori <><

>Copyright © 2001-2008 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Save His Cards

2009-05-11T07:00:00.000-04:00

Buy a pretty box (or dress up an existing one). Use it to save cards and letters your husband gives you (I hope it goes without saying that you don't have any cards or letters from old boyfriends tucked away!).

... this is my beloved ... Song of Songs 5:16 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Take time

2009-05-09T07:00:00.000-04:00

Make love to all of his body. It's easy to get in a rut and go through the same few motions during sex. Instead, take time to stroke, kiss, or nibble his ear, the back of his leg, the small of his back or all of his fingers (or toes).

... he is wholly desirable ... Song of Songs 5:16 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-08T11:22:00.003-04:00

Today, the Follower Spotlight falls on Kathy of Spirit Hope-Body,Mind,and Spirit Connection.

As stated on her blog she is a Biblical Health Coach and her mission is to teach and encourage all people how to achieve happiness and greater health, in their body, mind & spirit.

Her last post was an interesting and funny take on weight loss. Read it here -
The Ten Commandments Of Weight Loss Ladies and let her know you came via Help Meet Ministries.

The Generous Wife tip - Unconditional Generosity

2009-05-08T07:00:00.000-04:00

I had someone write me recently, telling me that their husband did not "deserve" their generosity. While I understand the personal hurt behind such a thought (really I do), I would like to suggest that generosity is not something that is given because it is deserved. It is given because of the nature of the giver, not the nature of the receiver. Generosity is an expression of the love in your heart directed toward others, regardless of how they will respond.
     There is not so much a tip in what I've written, but rather something just to ponder and allow God to use in your life. He desires to conform us to His image. He's generous. Allow Him to work that into your nature as well, regardless of how "deserving" people are or whether or not they are willing to respond in kind.

     Let a man set his heart only on doing the will of God and he is instantly free. If we understand our first and sole duty to consist of loving God supremely and loving everyone, even our enemies, for God's dear sake, then we can enjoy spiritual tranquility under every circumstance. A.W. Tozer

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - His Favorite Magazine

2009-05-07T07:00:00.001-04:00

Get a subscription to his favorite magazine. If he doesn't have a favorite magazine, subscribe to one that is about his favorite interest or hobby.

... Love is kind ... 1 Corinthians 13:4 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Book of the Month for May 2009

2009-05-06T21:40:00.001-04:00

CLICK ON THE IMAGE TO PURCHASE

The Generous Wife tip - Find That Spot

2009-05-04T07:00:00.000-04:00

What a fun idea from Lori today!

Put a small dab of perfume somewhere on your body and challenge your husband to find that spot. :)

You should put scent where you like to be kissed. Catherine Deneuve

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Follower Spotlight

2009-05-04T06:15:00.002-04:00

Today we begin our Follower Spotlight Feauture. We have some awesome followers who deserve a shout out and some link love.

Disclaimer: Help Meet Ministries does not necessarily endorse or agree with all the views represented on our Follower Highlight Feature sites.

Our first follower to be highlighted is Evelyn Johnson. Evelyn is the very first person to begin following the Help Meet Ministries blog. A big thank you to her for the encouragement. You can visit Evelyn and show her some love by clicking on each of the links below and let her know you came from the Help Meet Ministries site.

EMPOWERED CHRISTIAN WOMEN

EMPOWERED CHRISTIAN WOMEN RADIO SHOW

Generous wife tip - A peaceful homecoming

2009-05-02T09:08:00.001-04:00

Excellent tip from Lori today. No one wants to be close to someone who always brings bad news.

Sometimes when I listen to the news I am discouraged by all the bad news. I wonder, however, if I am not guilty of being a "bad news bearer" when my husband walks in the door. Do I barrage him with all the bad news of my day or do I make his homecoming a welcoming, peaceful experience?
So as a tip for today, when your husband arrives home, listen to yourself and begin to replace bad news with pleasant words and good news. Unless it is an absolute emergency, wait for a good time to address any challenging issues.

Anxiety in the heart of a man weighs it down, but a good word makes it glad. Proverbs 12:25 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Pamper Me! Friday

2009-05-01T07:09:00.003-04:00

Watch a chick flick or one of your favorite movies, curled up on the couch. Do absolutely nothing else but watch.

We would love to hear from you. What are the things you do to pamper yourself? When your idea is featured you get the credit and a link back to your blog or site if you have one. Encourage your friends to send their tips in as well.

EMAIL US

The Generous Wife tip - An Unfinished Sentence

2009-04-29T11:11:00.000-04:00

Ask your husband to finish the sentence, "I feel most loved when you _______." (Then make a point of doing that from time to time.)

You have made my heart beat faster ... Song of Songs 4:9 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Pamper Me! Friday

2009-04-24T07:07:00.002-04:00

Take a moment to enjoy the beauty of nature and interact with your environment. Slow down, breathe deeply and take a moment to reflect on all the things in your life that you have to be grateful for.

We would love to hear from you. What are the things you do to pamper yourself? When your idea is featured you get the credit and a link back to your blog or site if you have one. Encourage your friends to send their tips in as well.

EMAIL US

Domestic Diva Tuesday

2009-04-21T07:15:00.000-04:00

http://www.housekeepingchannel.com/

Stick to Your Resolution to Get Organized

Thinking something has got to change and making it change are often two different things. It doesn’t have to be that way. You can indeed resolve to get more organized and make it happen.

One of the top New Year’s Resolutions is to get organized. This year, you can make that happen by thinking like a professional organizer. So often people move through disorganization like a ball propelled by flippers in a pinball machine. You pick it up, put it down, enter a room then leave the room and pick something else up. This year, follow the logical steps that a professional organizer uses on projects.

Move from Getting Organized to Getting Real
While resolving to get organized is great, it doesn’t get you far. Get real about what that means. Turn that resolution into a more exact list, such as, “I resolve to organize my garage.” Or, “I resolve to clear and organize my closet so I can get dressed on time and out the door in the mornings.”

Almost everyone has more than one room, space or project in their life that needs organizing. As much as we want to change everything at once, it isn’t possible. Make a list of your areas that need organizing. Choose one to focus on. When that one is finished, choose another.

Move from Getting Real to Getting Specific
Now that you’ve chosen one space or one project, get specific. Grab a pad of paper and head to that spot. Make a list of everything that needs to happen in that space. Your list might contain things like: sort out old magazines and catalogs, purge books until they all fit on the shelves, gather everything that doesn’t belong in this room, empty file cabinet of old papers so the stacks can be filed, and so forth.

Value Your Time
You manage to make time for other things on your calendar from work appointments to doctor visits, ballgames and social events. Now make and keep appointments with yourself. Organizing doesn’t just happen. It happens when you make time for it. Take your to-do list from above and write those tasks into free spots on your calendar.

Get Reminders
Will you simply forget? There are tons of free online reminder services that will email you, such as www.free-minder.com or www.memotome.com.

Build a Habit
You really can get organized in this step-by-step manner. Completing each task on your calendar leads to that first space or room being organized. Now, repeat the process for your next space but remember to keep the first one tidy. As you do so, you are building an organizing habit. If you find your resolution falling by the wayside, don’t give up. Just grab your calendar and make plans to be organized.

http://www.housekeepingchannel.com

The Generous Wife tip - A Reminder Gift Item

2009-04-19T07:00:00.000-04:00

Buy a heart key chain, tie tack or other item for your husband to remind him of your love.

The greatest treasures are those invisible to the eye but found by the heart. Author Unknown

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Prayer

2009-04-18T07:00:00.000-04:00

There is a scriptural principle that says that "what you sow, you reap." With this in mind, pray that your husband would be drawn to do good things, to bless people and to develop a generous heart.

Now this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. 2 Corinthians 9:6 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Pamper Me! Friday

2009-04-17T07:07:00.002-04:00

Try wearing your hair different.

We would love to hear from you. What are the things you do to pamper yourself? When your idea is featured you get the credit and a link back to your blog or site if you have one. Encourage your friends to send their tips in as well.

EMAIL US

The Generous Wife tip - A Gentle Awakening

2009-04-17T07:00:00.000-04:00

Gently wake your husband a little earlier than usual for a little lovemaking.

Drink and imbibe deeply, O lovers. Song of Songs 5:1b NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - First Dates

2009-04-16T07:00:00.000-04:00

What did you do when you and your husband were first dating or as newlyweds? Did you hang out at a certain restaurant? Bookstore? Bowling alley? Why not do some of the the things you used to do and enjoy them all over again?

The greatest sweetener of human life is friendship. Joseph Addison

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Be Kind

2009-04-15T07:00:00.000-04:00

As a kindness, do your husband's least favorite chore for him. It will be such a nice treat for him to turn around and find that it's already been done.

Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck. Proverbs 3:3 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Domestic Diva Tuesday

2009-04-14T07:15:00.001-04:00

http://www.ehow.com

How to Be a Domestic Diva

We weren't all born to be like Martha Stewart, who has worn for some time the unofficial title of "America's Domestic Diva." But we can learn to clean, cook, sew, garden, decorate, design, dress, craft, entertain and socialize perfectly and with panache.

Step 1
Choose a motto for your domestic diva style. Something like, "I will reinvent the ordinary and make it extraordinary" or "I want my world to be simple, sweet and sensuous." This will become the theme of your life and most of your effort, time and money should be devoted to its creation.

Step 2
Assess if perhaps you aren't already a domestic diva and have just been too busy with the domestic part to enjoy the diva part. For example, if you've ever taught a complete stranger in a department store how to make a bow out of little pieces of ribbon or sent out invitations to a party you've penned in calligraphy yourself, you're probably already seasoned in the arts of, well, most everything domestic.

Step 3
Get organized. You're "nodiva" 'til everybody knows there's a place for everything and everything's in its place--at your place. Expert domestic divas such as Flylady.net will get you there fast.

Step 4
Learn to do it yourself. If your mother wasn't a domestic diva in her own right, you'd better take a generous portion of time to learn how to do everything you want to do, one thing at a time. For example, instead of just declaring your intent to become a domestic diva and trying to learn everything at once, take three months to learn to become a very good cook, three months to become an expert housekeeper, thee months to learn arts and crafts, and so on. By the end of year one, you'll be far ahead of most people and you'll start showing shades of a domestic diva.

Step 5
Stay flexible. If after a year you find yourself frustrated, start over.

The Generous Wife tip - Make Him Feel Appreciated and Loved

2009-04-14T07:00:00.000-04:00

What kinds of things really make your husband feel appreciated and loved? What makes him feel wanted? What makes him feel like he has value in your eyes? Some answers may come easily to you, but others may not. Please give this more than a cursory thought and intentionally do and say what will bless your husband.

Everything that can be counted does not necessarily count; everying that counts cannot necessarily be counted. Albert Einstein

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Kidnap Him

2009-04-13T07:00:00.000-04:00

Kidnap your husband for a few minutes of snuggle, talk, massage, or whatever you need to connect in a more intimate way.

Come my beloved ... Song of Songs 7:11a NKJV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - 10 different places

2009-04-11T07:00:00.001-04:00

This is a fun tip.

Kiss your husband in 10 different places. Have fun with this! :)    (You can also ask him to return the favor.)

     A kiss can be a comma, a question mark or an exclamation point. That's basic spelling that every woman ought to know. Mistinguett

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Pamper Me! Friday

2009-04-10T07:05:00.002-04:00

Try a new way to do your makeup.

We would love to hear from you. What are the things you do to pamper yourself? When your idea is featured you get the credit and a link back to your blog or site if you have one. Encourage your friends to send their tips in as well.

EMAIL US

The Generous Wife tip - Prayer Point

2009-04-10T07:00:00.000-04:00

Prayer is an extremely important part of marriage.

Pray for a deepening sense of trust and emotional intimacy in your marriage.

... the heart of her husband safely trusts her. Proverbs 31:11 NKJV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Build a Collection

2009-04-09T07:00:00.000-04:00

Let Lori's tip today spark some ideas for an activity with your husband. Read on:

My family and I made the trek to our storage unit today (we're just about done emptying it out) and took another load home. In and among all the odds and ends, we came across the boxes of PEZ (candy dispensers) that we've collected over the years. They are such a hoot. :)
     I'm not big on spending major bucks for things we don't need, but having a collection has opened the door to some great moments of quality time together as we searched for new additions (and made gift giving easy at times).
     I encourage y'all to start a collection with your husband. It doesn't have to be expensive. You can collect movie ticket stubs (they make interesting collages), salt and pepper shakers, or spoons. You can collect over a common hobby or interest (like collecting books about hymns or old lighthouses). Just open the door to some fun times looking for something new for your collection.

     Often the search proves more profitable than the goal. E.L. Konigsburg

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Throw out Stereotyping

2009-04-08T07:00:00.000-04:00

Interesting thoughts:

A tip borrowed from the generous husband ~

     We all know the usual stereotypes of how men and women think and feel sexually, and in large part most of those have some basis in what is most commonly experienced - but variations are far more common than most of us think. I've heard from men who want more foreplay and women who want very little (because they don't need it and want to get to "the good stuff"). I've heard from men who want to snuggle after, married to a woman who either falls asleep immediately or gets up and does something because sex "energizes" her.
     I could give other examples, but the point is men do not all feel, think and act the same way about sex, and neither do women. If what you feel is a bit different than what you think most men feel, it's not a problem unless you get worked up about it. Be honest with her, and work together to find a way to make you each happy with your sex life. Similarly, is it possible she has gone along with the classic female sexual role because she thinks she is supposed to, when in reality a part of that role is not what she wants, feels or enjoys? Give her "permission" to feel differently, to act differently, and to ask to try doing something different.

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Domestic Diva Tuesday

2009-04-07T07:15:00.000-04:00

Laines Letters

Dear Sisters,
I love an easier way of doing something, don't you? Here are 25 more easier ways that I have learned over the years.

1. Tie up your scissors. Don't laugh! This one really works. I have mine tied near my desk and can always find my scissors now. Smile.

2 Tie up your scotch tape. Ditto!

3. Have a bill and letter slot. I have an old red one on the side of my desk and put my bills and letters received in it right away. The top slot holds important papers for the year.

4. Have a letter writing box. I keep mine near my desk. Inside is my stationary, address book, pen, and any letters I need to respond to.

5. Set up your coffee or tea the night before. I found this to be really helpful as my eyes aren't working too good right off in the morning. So I only need one half slit eye to locate the stove and turn it on.

6. Set up your lunches the night before. I sure make a better lunch the night before than I do in the early morning.

7. In a hurry to go somewhere? Just wash the bangs and sides of your hair, then quickly blow dry. This is the part of your head that gets dirty first. My friend dabs baby powder in her hair if it is slightly oily, then brushes through as well.

8. Heat 1 cup of water to boiling in the microwave before cleaning the inside. It gets it nice and moist for wiping down.

9. For an easy care and pretty arrangement, pair purple and pink geraniums with trailing ivy in a clay flower pot. I love these in my "garden room."

10. Easy buttermilk: 2 T. buttermilk in a 1 qt. mason jar and fill with milk to the top. Put in a warm spot for 24 hours shaking every now and then. Just remember to save 2 T. of buttermilk for the next batch.

11. To save money on milk, use reconstituted dry milk in your baking.

12. Geraniums are the easiest plant to propagate. Just snip a soft section and plant your snip in the spring. I have so many plants from this method growing up fences, in an old wheelbarrow, and in flower pots.

13. Open both ends of a tomato paste can and push the paste through. You get it all that way much easier.

14. Tie up your eyebrow tweezers and toe nail clippers. You'll always be able to find them just like your scissors and scotch tape.

15. Write how many library books you checked out and when they are due (one day ahead of time) on your calendar.

16. Take butter out when you get up to soften it for your morning baking.

17. Call your grandmother, mother-in-law, or a favorite aunt every time your phone bill comes in. I do this method with my grandmother who lives on the other side of the country. So I always know when it is time to give her a call and have a nice chat.

18. Have an hour of quiet time for your kids. It teaches them to be quiet and helps you as well in the afternoon when you might be dragging a bit.

19. Take a 20-40 minute nap while the kids are having their quiet time. Another pick-me-up if you are dragging a bit.

20. Put on a pot of tea during the kids' quiet time and see how much you can get done before the water boils. Then sit down and relax for an afternoon tea break.

21. Keep your yeast in the freezer to keep it fresher longer.

22. Keep fresh ginger in the freezer ready to be grated any time for that Chinese dish.

23. Clean the smallest room first in the house, then keep going back to it for inspiration to clean the next room! And so on, and so on...

24. Try to cook as much as you can in the oven at the same time to save money on electricity . For example: a baked chicken, baked potatoes, and baked carrots with a small cake. Look for recipes that are temperature compatible.

25. Wherever you sit the most tape Scriptures that you want to memorize near there.

Love,
Laine

"I love you, LORD, my strength." Psalms 18:1

http://www.lainesletters.com/

The Generous Wife tip - Teasing

2009-04-07T07:00:00.000-04:00

Good teasing can be a good thing in marriage. Read on as Lori shares an experience her son had.

The other day in class, a girl told my son that he had beautiful eyes. It became something to tease him about in his circle of friends and, although there was a small amount of embarrassment about it (his friends tease hard), you have to know that it really blessed my son. ;)
That lead me to considering teasing and how that plays out in our marriages. I'm thinking that "positive" teasing is much preferable to "negative" teasing. So lets tease our husbands about things like how beautiful their eyes are or how well they kiss and not about how loud they snore or how their driving scares us. If there is something that really bothers you, handle it privately in a kind and respectful way. Save the teasing for those times when you want to bless him and call attention to the things that you love about him.

Before you make fun of someone, think about how you'd feel in their place. You shouldn't laugh, tease, or make fun of anyone. Chris Poulos

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Little Things

2009-04-06T07:00:00.000-04:00

The example of Lori's husband below speaks volumes. Read on:

Whenever my husband and I go to the bank, he gets me a root beer sucker (they have a bowl of them set out in all kinds of flavors). It's a little thing, even a silly thing, but it tells me that he cares about me and knows my preferences.
Are there little things like that that you can do for your husband? Perhaps it's buying his favorite flavor of ice cream or maybe it's always having a supply of his favorite kind of pen on hand. Little things over time often have more effect than the big splashy gifts and gestures of love.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. Robert Brault

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Make His Day Easier

2009-04-04T07:00:00.000-04:00

Here's Lori with today's tip:

My husband has been wrestling with code all day (doing some fine tuning on the new systems for the generous lists). It's not his favorite thing and so it's generally a stressful thing. I've tried to make his day easier, being available to help, taking care of stuff around the house, being generally sympathetic, running interference when need be, etc. It won't make working with code any easier, but it's nice to be able to take the pressure off and make his day a little nicer.
When your husband has a similarly trying day, I encourage you be understanding and helpful where you can and encourage him as you are able. It's so nice to be cared for when you are struggling with hard challenges.

Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses. Ann Landers

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Pamper Me! Friday

2009-04-03T07:05:00.002-04:00

Give yourself a manicure and pedicure, massage your feet with a good lotion and finish up with painting your nails.

We would love to hear from you. What are the things you do to pamper yourself? When your idea is featured you get the credit and a link back to your blog or site if you have one. Encourage your friends to send their tips in as well.

EMAIL US

The Generous Wife tip - Spiritual Parents

2009-04-03T07:00:00.000-04:00

Read on as Lori shares her tip based on her experience.

I just had a lovely couple of days. A good friend came to visit and we enjoyed a lot of talking, eating, laughter and prayer. I have to say that our guest probably comes as close as anyone to being a spiritual father to me. I feel deeply loved and encouraged in a way that only a father can impart to a daughter.
I encourage you and your husband to pray for "spiritual parents" who can speak into your life (though you may also be in a position to parents others as well). We all need to be in relationship to be healthy and having "family" in the body of Christ is a good thing (and often helpful when it comes to marriage matters).

Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus ... to Timothy my true son in the faith ... 1 Timothy 1:1-2b NIV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Pamper Him

2009-04-02T07:00:00.000-04:00

Send a special invitation to your husband for an evening of pampering. Help him out of his work clothes, draw a bath and gently scrub him all over and wash his hair. Warm his towel in the dryer and take your time drying him off. Have him lay down and give him a massage followed by leisurely love making. Then spend the rest of the evening enjoying each other's company. (Personalize this evening for your husband. You might include a meal, an at home movie, snuggling up with a good book, etc.)

Drink and imbibe deeply, O lovers.
Song of Songs 5:1b NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Take a Walk Together

2009-04-01T07:00:00.000-04:00

Go for a walk together. If you're city folk, walk in the mall. If you're country folk, go for a nature hike. Walk around the block or walk to the store and back. Just walk, hold hands and talk about your day, your dreams, anything or nothing.

This is my beloved, and this is my friend ...
Song of Songs 5:16 NKJV

Think generous! Lori

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Book of the Month for April 2009

2009-04-01T00:00:00.002-04:00

CLICK THE IMAGE TO PURCHASE.

Domestic Diva Tuesday

2009-03-31T07:15:00.000-04:00

Laine's Letters

Dear Sisters,
As I work around my house I think of you often and things that I would like to share with you. Things that I have learned to make my homemaking a bit more simpler. So while I am working today, I am finally going to write some of those things down. Here are 25 of them:

1) When you are putting away your dishes, open every drawer and cupboard until the job is done. So much easier than opening and shutting and opening and shutting a drawer or a cupboard.

2) Tape your favorite recipes to the inside of your cupboards. I have my favorite baking recipes inside the cupboard next to where I bake and my favorite stovetop recipes inside that cupboard for easy access.

3) If you need cake flour for a recipe, take out two tablespoons of flour per cup and replace it with two tablespoons of corn starch.

3) Set your table early in the day, if possible. It will just motivate you to cook! And it looks so welcoming to your husband when he comes home. Your children will look on in anticipation as well.

4) Plant lavender by your clothes line. The smell is heavenly as you brush against it hanging out your clothes.

5) Buy some cinnamon carpet powder. I have some sprinkled all over my bedroom carpet awaiting my vacuuming. I don't even mind vacuuming knowing that I can smell that wonderful scent in my bedroom all day. A small pleasure for 99 cents at my local five and dime store.

6) Think hospitality. The LORD might bring someone to your home today. Have one room clean and ready. (Sort of the "parlor idea" so popular way back.) Also the bathroom clean. Those are the two rooms you would probably have to use if you should have a surprise guest. This happened to me recently. The rest of my house was not ready, but I had my living room ready which I led them to and served them in. I was able to focus on my guests and enjoy their company, rather than worrying about my home. Even an outside spot can be ready! Remember Abraham serving the LORD and the angels under a great tree when they unexpectedly arrived one afternoon.

7) Think Christmas all year. My mom just brought over some items she was getting rid of. I didn't need them, but they were perfect for Christmas presents. My budget is very tight, so I shop a little here and there. I put them with the many gifts I have already acquired. It is always my goal to be done Christmas shopping by December and to just enjoy being with my family.

8) Set up a baking center. It is so nice when all your baking items are gathered together in one spot for easy baking. I like to put my ingredients in old fashioned jars which makes cooking even that more delightful. My flour is in old candy jars, the baking powder and baking soda are in old blue mason jars, and my brown sugar is in an apothecary jar with a heavy glass lid. I pick them up here and there at thrift shops or garage sales. I can leave everything out and they go with my decor!

9) Break up the cleaning of your refrigerator by assigning each child a shelf or a section of the door. I get my refrigerator clean pretty fast this way and keep up on it as well.

10) Have beautiful praise music going while you work. Oh, how that helps you to keep your mind on the LORD even while others around you are quite grumpy. Can you tell what I am dealing with right now? Smile.

11) Have a little blackboard put up near your sink. Every time you run out of something, put it on this blackboard. With only a glance I can see what I need when I make out my shopping list.

12) Keep a small notebook near your computer to write down pertinent information. I have a small one that is just for herbal information which I learn as I go. Another is for a prayer list.

13) Keep verses you'd like to memorize on or near your computer. I have in front of me right now: "Always give yourselves fully to the work of the LORD. You know that your work in the LORD is never wasted." 1 Corinthians 15:58b

14) Never leave a room empty handed. Carry something out that shouldn't be there while you are passing through. I get a lot of stretching in this way as I bend down quite a bit. Smile.

15) Keep a little notebook in your kitchen to record those things that you need to do but keep forgetting. This helps my mind be at peace so much. I glance at this notebook several times a day to remind me what needs to be done. I feel peace the moment I write something down knowing now that I will not forget it.

16) Keep a bottle of windex and some paper towels under the sink in your bathroom. Takes only a moment to spray everything down quickly and then wipe it all up. While I have the bottle in my hand I go around spraying every mirror or glass item in the house that needs it.

17) Keep a bottle of windex, some paper towels, a small bag for trash, and a wisk broom in your vehicle. When you are waiting somewhere you can clean your vehicle out in no time. I've done this while waiting at piano lessons.

18) Keep two sponges by your kitchen sink. It is much faster to use both hands while wiping and cleaning than just one hand and one sponge.

19) Wash your cake pans as soon as you remove the cake. So much easier to clean than when dry and crusty.

20) Try a few new recipes every week. This keeps your cooking interesting and gives you something to look forward to try. This week I tried making english muffins, soft pretzels, and an orange bread for the first time. Not all turned out like I had hoped, but the ones that did gave me anticipation and enjoyment.

21) Keep a couple of cookbooks, finance books, and anything else you might want to learn from in your bathroom in a pretty basket. Snatch read when you have the chance. You know you'll be in that room for sure in a day!

22) Cut your coupons and put them right away in your purse. Put the food items together in one bunch and the non-food items together in another bunch for easy access once you are in the market.

23) When you get your tithe ready, put it right away in your Bible. That way you won't forget it and will have it ready when you leave for church.

24) Put all your cleaning supplies in a pretty basket to carry around with you from room to room as you work. Mine are in a pretty rose basket. Even my husband loved this idea. It was my seven year old daughter who thought of it and put it together for me!

25) Invest in some burner covers. My old stove looks clean and bright with these in place.

Have a wonderful day now!

Love,
Laine
www.lainesletters.com/

The Generous Wife tip - The Time Capsule

2009-03-31T07:00:00.000-04:00

Create an anniversary time capsule. Find a nice sized box and every year open the box on your anniversary to look through and enjoy the contents, and add a few things to it. Be creative. Add a CD of "your song." Add pictures of vacations, love letters, silly cards or tickets to special dates, whatever represents the last year of your marriage together. Let it become a record of your journey through life together.

Love vanquishes time. To lovers, a moment can be eternity, eternity can be the tick of a clock.
Mary Parrish

Think generous! Lori

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Fewer rough spots

2009-03-30T07:00:00.000-04:00

Buy some nice "manly" smelling lotion and routinely rub it on the rough and dry parts of your husband's body. It will give your husband some nice sensual touch and make him easier to hug (fewer rough spots). :)

His body is carved ivory inlaid with sapphires ...
Song of Songs 5:14b NKJV

Think generous! Lori

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Tweak the tips to fit your life

2009-03-28T07:00:00.000-04:00

From time to time I get an email from someone who feels they don't have the time to implement many of the tips (it's especially tough for moms of little ones). Realize that the generous tips are designed to give you a pool of ideas to use. If you cannot do the exact tip, give it a bit of thought to see if you can alter the tip to work for you (some seasons of life require more creativity than others). You don't have to do all the tips. They are there to inspire you in finding creative ways to bless your husband.
     Having a day in the buff with your husband may not be possible, but making the bedroom a no clothes zone might be (hang a robe by the door). Going out to dinner may be nearly impossible, but sharing a late night snack after the kids are down is doable. Take the theme of the tip and see how it can be shaped to work for you.
     If you have little ones, I encourage you to develop a set bedtime that is early enough to give you and your husband some couple time in the evening. Swap babysitting with another mom (and those of you with grown children might pray about offering to babysit for a young mother so that she can have some time with her husband, what a precious gift to offer another woman).
     The other thing to consider (and this is for all of us) is that, generally speaking, we are all too busy. It may be time to carefully consider your obligations and choices and simplify life a bit so that you have more time for relationships, especially time for your husband. It's a personal call, but keep in mind that a relationship is generally as strong as the amount of effort and time that you put into it. Nourish your marriage.

     The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak. Hans Hoffman

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Pamper Me! Friday

2009-03-27T07:04:00.002-04:00

Take a bubble bath, light a candle, wrap up in a nice warm robe and relax with a cup of tea.

We would love to hear from you. What are the things you do to pamper yourself? When your idea is featured you get the credit and a link back to your blog or site if you have one. Encourage your friends to send their tips in as well.

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The Generous Wife tip - Be Calm

2009-03-27T06:49:00.000-04:00

Here's Lori with today's tip:

One of the things that I have generally worked toward is being calm regardless of the circumstances. I pray for that kind of calm and I routinely keep an eye on my behavior, voice, etc. Now, please understand, that I'm not perfect. It's just a goal of mine to be calm. I think it's a good gift to give to your husband, kids, friends, etc.


So as a suggestion, I encourage y'all to watch how you act and speak and consider working at being calm. Don't expect perfection, just make it a general goal, learn from your mistakes, and work toward being more calm.



Sometimes God calms the storm ... Sometimes He lets the storm rage and calms the child. Author Unknown

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Email Him

2009-03-26T07:02:00.000-04:00

One of Lori's readers have another tip to share today. Read on.

Another creative tip from a generous wife ~ (thanks, Diane!)

... I was inspired a few weeks ago to share with my [dear husband] why I love him. Now, each weekday morning, I send a quick email title "You." In it I list one reason why I love him. (This goes to his own blackberry - not to his work email or blackberry.) It blesses him and helps me to remember to focus on his good points every day.

For you see, each day I love you more. Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow. Rosemonde Gerard

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Romance Him

2009-03-21T07:00:00.000-04:00

Here's Lori:

Let's romance our husbands with a love letter this week. What does your husband need to read to feel loved? Is he the kind of guy who needs paper to hold or is he an email kind of guy? Does he like poetry or just a few heartfelt words that express your love?
A small gift or a bit of candy would be a nice addition for those who have husbands with "gifts" as a love language.

All I really need is love, but a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt! Lucy Van Pelt (in Peanuts, by Charles M. Schulz)

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Pray for Him

2009-03-20T07:00:00.002-04:00

Prayer is extremely important. You should be your husband's biggest prayer warrior.

Here's Lori:

Pray for your husband to have healthy, harmonious relationships.

If is is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Romans 12:18 NIV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®.
Copyright©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society.
Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

The Generous Wife tip - He's Worth It

2009-03-19T07:00:00.001-04:00

Show a little kindness today.

Here's your tip for today:
Look at the condition of your husband's things. Are any of his tools, clothes, etc. in need of fixing or replacing? (I'm not talking about his absolutely favorite t-shirt, the one with several holes, that's sacred ground.) ;) Fix up what you can and encourage him to mend, fix or replace the rest. He's worth it!

... but love edifies (builds up).
1 Corinthians 8:1b NAS

The Generous Wife tip - Do Something Together

2009-03-18T07:00:00.000-04:00

Today Lori shares her experience of fighting anemia and using her recovery as a way to bond with her husband. What can you do today together with your husband?

Here's Lori:

My husband donates blood on a regular basis. I haven't, largely because I fight anemia, but I've been a good girl about taking iron and now my numbers are good enough that they like my blood too. :) So this last week I started giving blood as well.
Aside from doing something good for others (which is always a plus), it's one more thing that my husband and I can do together. We laugh and talk with folks as we go through the process and walk off with matching heart stickers (though my husband is a total show off - he's a good bleeder and whizzes through the process, while they're still trying to figure out where my veins are) <rolling eyes>
You might not be able to give blood, but there are any number of ways you can join your husband in being generous or kind to others. All you need to do is find something that you and your husband are both comfortable with and go for it. Help a single mom with her yard. Babysit kids so that your friends can have a date. Invite an older couple out for dinner. Help with a church project.

The human being who lives only for himself finally reaps nothing but unhappiness. Selfishness corrodes. Unselfishness ennobles, satisfies. Don't put off the joy derivable from doing helpful, kindly things for others. B.C. Forbes

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
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http://www.the-generous-wife.com

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The Generous Wife tip - Kiss Him

2009-03-17T07:32:00.000-04:00

When your husband is sitting with his back to you, sneak up and give him a kiss on the back of his neck.

Now a soft kiss - Aye, by the kiss, I vow an endless bliss. John Keats

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Book of the Month for March 2009

2009-03-16T06:06:00.001-04:00

For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men

By Shaunti Feldhahn

CLICK ON THE BOOK IMAGE TO PURCHASE.

The Generous Wife tip - Encourage and Inspire Each Other

2009-03-16T06:03:00.000-04:00

Encouraging and inspiring each other can definitely help build a solid marriage. Good tip today from one of Lori's readers. Read on to see what Lori shares in today's generous wife tip.

Here's a sweet tip from a generous wife ~ (thanks, Shelley!)

My husband and I have started emailing each other inspirations. He started it. It can be a website, poem, scripture, picture, anything. This has been really good to learn about what inspires him (from a quote from A.W. Tozer to rainy days). It also really makes me think about what inspires me.
We have to each do one a week and we have to wait on the other to respond (you can't send two in a row).

Inspiration is the gift of those who have experienced life at its most defined moments. Sasha Azevedo

Generous Wife tip - Fun and laughter

2009-03-12T07:02:00.000-04:00

Pray for a sense of play, humor and fun in your marriage. Being serious all the time makes everyone a bit cranky, so ask the Lord to infuse your marriage with fun and laughter.

Mirth is God's medicine. Everybody ought to bathe in it.
Henry Ward Beecher

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Games for loving

2009-03-09T07:53:00.000-04:00

Today's tip from Lori adds a little spice to the itimacy equation:
After a recent tip about a card game, I was inundated with reminders that just about any game could be used to play a strip version of the game. Just take the game and make certain cards or moves mean "remove a piece of clothing" or "put on a piece of clothing." And, personally, I think there is nothing wrong with stacking the deck on this sort of game. ;)

Life consists not in holding good cards, but in playing those you hold well. Josh Billings

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Share what you learn with each other

2009-03-07T07:15:00.000-04:00

Read on as Lori shares her experience in today's tip:

My husband and I went to a conference recently. We love learning together and when we can we do, but often there is just too much material to cover or desired workshops conflict, so we end up splitting the work load and then sharing the "good stuff" with each other later. It's rather fun to share and it really keeps me sharp because I will need to communicate well and accurately what I have heard/read.
I encourage y'all to share on a regular basis what you are reading, listening to, or watching. It's a great way of connecting with your husband and you get to spread the learning around as well.

You learn something every day if you pay attention. Ray LeBlond

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - A fun tip

2009-03-06T07:28:00.000-04:00

Here's a fun tip from a generous wife. (thanks, Brittney!)

Last night my husband and I sat down for dinner and out of nowhere I asked him to use the letters of my name to describe me (for example, B - beautiful, R - remarkable, etc.). It was fun.

My thoughts: this idea lends itself to a number of fun ways to bless your husband. You can do likewise for his name (use the letters of his name as an acrostic), create a crossword puzzle or wordsearch with the words, write a love letter with the words, etc. Basically you want to use a little word play to tell your husband how special he is to you.

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Compliment him

2009-03-05T07:42:00.000-04:00

Does your husband have beautiful eyes? A nice muscled chest? Curly hair that melts your heart? What physical feature of his appeals to you? Tell him about it.

How handsome you are, my lover! Oh, how charming! Song of Songs 1:16a NIV

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Pray for your husband

2009-03-04T07:39:00.001-04:00

Pray for your husband's mind. Not really meaning to be funny, I just realized today how many messages are thrown at someone's mind in the typical day. Everything from truth to lies with lots of clutter, temptation, and odd bits of stuff thrown in. Pray for clarity and a hunger for truth. Pray for wisdom and protection from temptation.

... that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened ... Ephesians 1:17-18a NKJV

Think generous! Lori
Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Plan something together

2009-03-03T07:29:00.002-04:00

Planning events make it a shared and bonding experience.

Plan a surprise event with your husband. Whether it's a surprise birthday party for a friend or a visit to someone in a retirement home, have a little fun together by planning a surprise blessing.

It's so much more friendly with two.
Piglet, Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A.A. Milne

Think generous! Lori

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Turn him on deliberately

2009-03-02T07:32:00.000-04:00

You know what turns on your husband. So do it - and make it plain that you did it on purpose. You are in effect saying that you like him sexually to the point that you enjoy turning him on deliberately.

You have made my heart beat faster, my sister, my bride ... Song of Songs 4:9a NAS

Think generous! Lori
Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved

http://www.the-generous-wife.com

Book of the Month for March 2009

2009-03-02T00:01:00.000-04:00

For Women Only: What You Need to Know About the Inner Lives of Men

By Shaunti Feldhahn

CLICK ON THE BOOK IMAGE TO PURCHASE.

Generous wife tip - The way we look

2009-02-28T07:03:00.000-04:00

Excellent advice as usual from Lori. Sometimes we have to really work on improving my appearance for our hubby's pleasure.

Here's Lori,

Generally speaking, you can't help morning breath or moments of being rather rumpled because of life (it's humanly impossible to look and smell pretty 24/7). That said, don't let the familiarity that comes with years of marriage cause you to slide in your effort to be fresh and pretty for your husband.
I'm not suggesting the impossible. I remember those baby days when I struggled to get a shower by the end of the day or days when I hit the floor running because of work demands. Life does happen and hubbies need to understand the pull of responsibilities. I'm just encouraging a certain amount of self care so that we are healthy and so that we can be a pleasing partner to our spouse.

... the fragrance of your breath [is] like apples, and your mouth like the best wine! Song of Songs 7:8b-9 NAS

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2008 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Lifelong study

2009-02-26T18:28:00.003-04:00

Today's tip is one of the reasons that marriage is for life. You get to know your spouse more and more with each passing year.

Here's Lori:
Yesterday I mentioned a lovely gift basket that someone had given us. In the basket was a card game. Basically it was just a bunch of cards each with a question to answer and instructions on a variety of ways to use the cards.
On a lark I pulled it out and started pestering Paul with questions. He insisted that I answer them too (imagine that), so we went through several of them, each taking a turn and we even tried a few times to guess what the other would answer. Lots of giggling (ok, that was me, men don't giggle, or at least mine doesn't) and interesting sharing later, I have to admit it was a pretty good game.
After a number of years of marriage you get to where you think you know everything about your spouse. Not true. People continue to grow and change. So the next time you go to a movie, ask your husband what his favorite line or scene was. When you hear a song that you like, use that to remind yourself to ask your husband what his favorite song is. Use real life to give you questions so that you have opportunity to share with each other and remain "updated" on your spouse. (Sorry the card game company does not have a working website yet - Heart to Heart: The Conversation Cards by Easter Unlimited Inc.)

Questions show the mind's range, and answers, its subtlety. Joseph Joubert

Think generous! Lori <><

Copyright © 2001-2009 Lori J. Byerly
All Rights Reserved
http://www.the-generous-wife.com

The Generous Wife tip - Ways to be a blessing

2009-02-26T01:44:00.001-04:00

Today's tip helps us to think about ways that we can be a blessing to our husbands.

Read on to hear what Lori has to say:
Paul and I did some traveling recently and, in one of the homes that welcomed us, there was a gift basket on the bed with all kinds of goodies. There were chocolates, wine and glasses (and the all important device that pulls out the cork), a couple of romantic card games, bubbles (not sure about that one lol), a candle, and a few munchies. It just seemed such a thoughtful gesture and very marriage friendly.
I'm always looking for fun ideas, so I'm just passing this off to y'all on the list to tuck in your idea file. It's a thoughtful gesture for your guests, and a gift basket, in any number of themes, could also be a blessing to your husband.

Sensual pleasures are like soap-bubbles, sparkling, effervescent.
James H. Aughey

Generous wife tip - Gestures of love

2009-02-25T07:22:00.000-04:00

Do something thoughtful for your husband this week. This tip can be a starting point.

Find a moment to slip up behind your husband and give him a little shoulder and neck rub. This is always an appreciated gesture, especially at the end of the day.

But we commend ourselves in every way as [true] servants of God: though ... kindness ... in unfeigned love. 2 Corinthians 6:4,6 Amplified

Generous wife tip - Home pleasures

2009-02-24T07:25:00.000-04:00

Our husbands are part of the home too. Show it by the way you arrange some things.

Is there a spot in the house that just doesn't work for your husband? Maybe it's the drop off spot by the front door, or maybe it's the bedroom closet. Wherever it is, take the time to pray and consider how things could be arranged more conveniently for him.

Do not let kindness and truth leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Proverbs 3:3 NAS

Generous wife tip - A hug and a prayer

2009-02-23T07:20:00.000-04:00

This is an exercise in spiritual growth as well as marital growth. Try it.

My husband grabs me for a hug and a prayer whenever he senses that I am getting a bit stressed. It's nice that he is aware of me and it's a great encouragement to know that he wants to pray for me. I've been trying to do the same for him and it's really become an exercise in awareness and intentionality. That's not a complaint, just an assessment.
I encourage y'all to do similarly. Keep an eye on your husband and hug and pray as it seems appropriate.

A hug is two hearts wrapped in arms. Author Unknown

The Generous Wife tip - A slug hug

2009-02-21T07:39:00.000-04:00

This tip touches :)

LOL! Leave it to a generous wife to come up with a slug quote! (thanks, Nikki!)

If I could be just anything, I think I'd be a slug. Then I could crawl right up your sleeve, and give you a great big hug.

Hugging is a great idea too. Most cultures don't allow for a huge amount of touch and touch is so needed. Please make an intentional effort to touch your husband a lot. Hug. Stoke. Kiss. Pat. Touch, touch, touch.

The Generous Wife tip - Acts Of Service

2009-02-20T07:24:00.000-04:00

If your husband's love language is Acts of Service this tip is a must for you!

Ask your husband if there is anything that you can do for him to make his day easier. I've done this frequently and it is always a kindness, even if there is nothing that he needs done. It's just so nice to know that there is someone that cares about your day.

... put on a heart of ... kindness ... Colossians 3:12 NAS

The Generous Wife tip - Friendships that edify

2009-02-19T14:09:00.001-04:00

Lori's tip for today is a good one as always:

Paul and I are good friends with another couple. Over the past few months our relationship with them has become rather difficult and it was all coming to a head in a rather painful way. We chose to involve a third party in trying to sort things out. I won't say that miracles happened, but we were able to talk and work through some of the difficulties. We hope to continue to work through our differences and remain friends.
The reason I share this is because I think that the "third party principle" is a good thing. Sometimes you just need someone else to keep things honest, fair and sane. If you are particularly struggling in your marriage, I encourage you to consider involving a third party. That might be a counselor, a mentor, or even just a wise friend.

A couple of options ...
http://aacc.net/resources/find-a-counselor/
http://family-marriage-counseling.com/

Generous Wife tip - Kissing

2009-02-18T06:14:00.001-04:00

This is a very interesting assignment from Lori today. Try it!

Kiss at the same time every day. Set your watch or computer alarm or pick a time when you are almost always together (at breakfast, watching the evening news, etc.).

... your mouth [is] like the best wine! Song of Songs 8:9 NAS

Generous Wife tip - Fireproof

2009-02-17T01:38:00.002-04:00

Lori is right this movie is a must see! The link to more information about it is below today's tip from Lori.

I was wandering around WalMart today and noticed the Fireproof and Love Dare books on display (didn't see the movie, but I think it's available now). In my mind, they are good marriage resources. Good for a general marriage check up and as something to hand to a friend struggling with their marriage.

True love is friendship - caught on fire. Author Unknown